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The Mall Arkey Weekly Column

5/4/2007 Water Conservation: Is it necessary? (Part 3) Mall Arkey was the target of a clever attack last week. Acting editor Wendy Clay faxed it to us. “Here’s a letter we received at the Lakeshore News,” she wrote. “It has no name, so we won’t print it.” Old Mall Arkey doesn’t like to hide anything from you, so here is the letter: Here’s a quiz for Mall Arkey readers (they know how he loves quizzes). Mall Arkey is against water conservation because: (a) He has no friends to shower with; (b) He can’t seem to get his money tree to grow, so he has to vacation in a beat up van rather than a luxury hotel; (c) He’s so full of it that he has to flush twice to get it all down; (d) All of the above. Signed: The Water Fairy I’m sure you’ll have no trouble picking the Water Fairy’s correct answer! No, the real reason is (e) none of the above. I oppose water conservation measures because in a province like British Columbia they aren’t necessary. They’re environmental correctness gone mad. Worse, adopting water conservation actually makes a water system more expensive because it adds to the fixed costs of the system. The environmentalists’ argument goes like this: Water is just like gas or electricity. Some people use more than others, so they should pay more. The folks who use less shouldn’t have to subsidize those who waste water. We should meter everyone’s use of water so everyone pays his or her fair share. On the surface this seems reasonable. Fortunately, water isn’t like gas and electricity. It’s much less expensive. Last week I calculated the cost of the electricity, chlorine, and equipment maintenance required to pump a liter of water to your home at .005 or one two hundredths of a cent. The average household uses 350 liters of water a day, which means that Salmon Arm residents pay less than two cents a day for their water. Remember, the two-cent average does not include either the water system’s capital costs or the cost of the salaries and benefits of the municipal employees who operate it. These costs don’t change if you use a bit more or a bit less water. So if your neighbor uses twice as much water as you do, it will cost the municipality (i.e. ratepayers) an extra two cents a day, an amount too trivial to worry about. Nevertheless, in order to encourage you to use less water and to make the system fair, environmentalists want you, your neighbor, and everyone else to install a water meter at a cost of, perhaps, $500 each. At the extra two cents a day it will take 71 years to pay for the meter and bring your neighbor to justice! The goal of Salmon Arm’s Water Efficiency Committee is to get you to use 20 per cent less water. Assuming that water meters are installed in all of Salmon Arm’s 5,000 homes at a cost exceeding two million dollars and assuming everyone reduces their water usage 20%, the savings will be 20% x 5,000 homes x 350 liters a day x 365 days x .005 cents a liter or (are you ready for this?) $6,400. With a 20% reduction in household use, the town would save less than ten thousand dollars on chlorine, electricity, and equipment maintenance. Believe it or not, the municipality currently spends $30,000 of your tax dollars each year on a campaign to achieve this goal! But wait a minute! If everyone had a water meter, the city would have to hire people to read them. Those folks would have to be provided with trucks and fuel and equipment and union benefits. Clerks would have to be hired to mail out your bill and to keep track of your payments. I suspect that government folks understand this, and that one of the principal motives behind environmental initiatives like water conservation is the I-like-to-be-the-boss-of- more-of-you phenomenon. One thing is certain: Any serious attempt to introduce water conservation will inevitably result in a substantial increase in the fixed costs of the system. If you need proof of this, ask anyone in Vernon what they pay each year for metered water. Do you need to install low-flush toilets, reduced-flow showerheads, and a water meter to save the city a buck or two each year? Do you really need to limit your lawn watering to every third day? No. Water is so plentiful and the cost of delivering it to your home is so trivial that such measures make no sense. Forget water meters. Salmon Arm’s modest fixed annual fee for water gives you the best value for your tax dollar. I suspect that this is true of most municipalities in Canada. Take that you water fairy!

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